


baby, when i think about you

by wildheart96



Category: Love Simon (2018), Simon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda - Becky Albertalli, spierfeld - Fandom
Genre: Awkwardness, Flirting, Fluff, Kissing, M/M, i miss them, like yes, sorry if it feels rushed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-27
Updated: 2018-05-27
Packaged: 2019-05-14 09:23:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,851
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14766893
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wildheart96/pseuds/wildheart96
Summary: “You are so freaking cute” said Bram, making Simon blush almost immediately.“Oh. My god.” said Simon laughing nervously.“Simon, you are blushing.”“No, I'm not.”“Yes, you are.”





	baby, when i think about you

**Author's Note:**

> uhh i've had this in my notes for the longest time so i finally decided to post it because i miss spierfeld so much !! sorry if it's trash, i just want them back <333 ok thx

Simon was a theater nerd.  
Always has been and always will be. He wasn't ashamed of it but none of his friends would get it. Still, a bit of a nerdy thing to admit. 

He was on his way to pick up his boyfriend, Bram.  
Oh lord, did it felt nice to say he had a boyfriend.  
He was still getting used to the idea of Bram knowing who he was. It had been two weeks since they started dating and Simon was still a nervous wreck around him. Every moment they spent together he found himself feeling self-aware and scared that he would scare Bram off. At the end of the day, neither of them was expecting the other to be the one behind the emails.  
But Bram was better than he expected. Actually, he was almost too nice to be real. He was always wearing a smile on his face and greeting him with a quick kiss no matter where they would meet. His heart would start beating fast anytime they'd look at each other for more than two seconds.

Simon really, really, really liked him.  
It was kind of driving him insane.

He pulled up in front of Bram's house, which was a really nice two floored place in a cute neighborhood. Simon wondered when he would have to meet Bram's parents. And how would that be like? 

How do you even do any of this? How could he be sure that Bram wasn't disappointed that he wasn't talking to someone else? 

He saw Bram getting out of the house. He was wearing a yellow shirt and blue jeans, before he even got in the car, he was already smiling.  
Simon unlocked the car and opened the door for him.

“Good morning” Bram said softly, sitting beside him. 

God, he was so pretty.

“Good morning, are we going for the usual coffee?” Simon asked turning the car on.

“Sure” Bram answered grinning.

“I'll put some music on, is that okay?” he asked taking his phone in his hands. Bram nodded, and turned on the radio. 

The music started just where Simon left it and suddenly If I Could Tell Her from Dear Evan Hansen, one of his favorite musicals, was playing on the speakers.

“Who's singing?” Bram asked genuinely curious.

“Oh, it's nothing.” Simon said, quickly looking for another song.  
“Just from a musical”.

He was used to not sharing this kind of songs with his friends. Nick, Leah and Abby weren't particularly theater kids. Abby liked to be in the productions their school would put together, but was never actually invested in the ‘fandoms’. All of them were more into Drake and Beyoncé. Leah liked foreign music, always into K-pop.  
They liked the ‘normal stuff’. So he would always keep these to himself.

“Wait, do you know all the words to this show?” Bram asked.

“Uh, yeah. Kind of.“ Simon said, immediately feeling ashamed, he didn't even know why. It was ridiculous. “It's silly, I know but the story is actually really good. And the songs, I mean, they could be in the radio if they we...”

Bram cut him off. ”Simon, it's okay.” He said chuckling. “You can leave it on if you want to”. He was still smiling.

Simon took a breath. “Right, sorry. Yeah we can listen to this.” 

They drove all the way to the drive-tru and asked for their usual orders. At this point Simon had memorized what Bram's favorite coffee was. They took their cups and started to drive away.

They were both sitting in a nice silence. It wasn't awkward, they just felt like enjoying each other's company. Sometimes Simon would glance at Bram and admire how great the sunlight that came trough the window looked on him. Half way through the path, the song changed to A Million Dreams, from The Greatest Showman. He just recently got into that film, but oh boy did it make him happy.

“Hey, I saw this movie with my parents a couple of months ago!” Bram said excited. “I really liked it.” And Simon was totally not freaking out because he knew where the song was from. 

“Yeah, this might be my favorite song.” Simon said, and he wasn't lying. He couldn't help but sing along every time it came on. He was trying not to this time though.

As the song moved on the to the second verse, Simon started humming the words, and soon he was quietly whispering the lyrics.  
By the time the chorus hit, Simon was already fully singing without realizing, grabbing the wheel with both hands, moving his head a little and staring into the road.  
He almost didn't notice how quiet Bram was.

He turned to see Bram staring at him with his head resting in one of his hands, like he was admiring him, with a small smirk on his face.

“What?” Simon asked.

“You are so freaking cute” said Bram, making Simon blush almost immediately.

“Oh. My god.” said Simon laughing nervously.

“Simon, you are blushing.”

“No, I'm not.”

“Yes, you are.”

“Alright. Sorry, I got excited.” He was pretty sure he was still feeling dizzy about the fact that Bram had called him cute.

“You are the only person I know that apologizes for being adorable.” 

“I just- I never- I don't usually listen to these stuff, you know? Like theater. That's just- that's just a guilty pleasure of mine” Simon stutters. And then it's silent. He notices Bram is confused.

Bram look down for a second and then raised his head a little.

“Do I make you nervous?” he asks, looking at him. 

Simon glances at Bram for a second then looks into the road again. “What? You? No, uh, what do you mean?”

“You just, don't seem to be comfortable around me. Am I doing something wrong?”

Oh God, he made Bram feel bad. He was screwing everything up. 

“Oh my god, no. Absolutely not. It's just...”, Could he be more awkward? “It's not you. I swear. I'm just a mess.”

I'm a mess when you're around.

“You know, if you don't wanna do this I'm okay with it. We can not date for a while and just be with each other if you don't feel conformable.” 

No, no, no, no.

“What?! No. No way.” Said Simon, freaking out. “No. I- I'm sorry. This is stupid. I mean, I'm stupid, not us. This is-this is great.”

He took a big breath, and stopped on a red light. Maybe he just had to tell Bram how he felt, that would be much easier. He was looking at Simon like he was waiting for an explanation. His eyes were soft and a bit sad. Simon exhaled.

“It's just, I'm not used to having a boyfriend. I mean I've had girlfriends before, I've told you that, but I've never felt this way about anyone else. And honestly? It's freaking me out. And  
I don't wanna disappoint you or scare you off because you are genuinely so SO amazing. Like, you're even better than I was expecting and I don't know if I am any better than what you were imagining. So yeah, if I seem nervous it's probably because I am. And I'm trying really hard to not screw things up and enjoy the fact that you decided to be with me for some reason.” Simon said, and then the light turned green and the car started moving again.

Bram was quiet for a second.

“Sorry...” 

“Don't apologize.” Said Bram, letting out a small laugh. “Can you park there?” 

So he did, and he was kind of starting to get nervous again. Then after a moment of silence Bram turned to him and tool his hands in his.

“I like you, Simon. I like you so much that it scares me too.” He started. “I like the way you talk like you write. I like how beautiful your eyes are. I like your obsession with musicals. And all the things that make you you.”

Simon's heart was racing so fast and it was starting to get filled with emotion.

“You are crazy if you think I'm even slightly disappointed in you. I couldn't ask for a better person I'd rather spend my Sundays with. And I can't believe you'd think that you don't deserve me. God, have you seen yourself?” 

Simon looked at him, and he could swear his face was literally doing heart eyes. 

“I like you, Simon.” said Bram, holding his hands.

Simon smiled so widely he could feel his cheeks go up. He looked down for a second and then back at Bram.

“I'm sorry I've been so weird.” he said. Bram chuckled and Simon suddenly felt a wave of confidence. “You're just so adorable sometimes it makes me unstable.”

Bram laughed, then he stared at him, a soft smile across his face. He placed one hand on Simon's cheek, and he was basically dying on the inside.

This still felt so weird. Having a boyfriend, he means. He feels nervous and loved and dizzy all at the same time. He always thought it was dumb when people would talk about having butterflies on their stomach, but he understand now.

And he kind of loves it. 

Bram is still staring a him, it feels like an hour in the best possible way, but it was really a couple of seconds until, weird enough, Simon spoke.

“Is it okay if I kiss you?” he asked, not really thinking straight.

Bram looked surprised. “Are you okay with that?”

Simon smiled. And suddenly it was like the day they kissed on the ferris wheel all over again. He still remembers it like it was yesterday. He remembers Bram asking him if he was disappointed that it turned out to be him. But he wasn't, not at all. In fact, a part of him always wanted it to be Bram. Cute, nice, almost-too-smart-for-school Bram. Thinking back the next day, he was proud of himself for kissing him first. He didn't know what had gotten into him at that point, or how he got the courage to do it, but it was everything he wanted it to be.

Now he is feeling the exact same way, and he suddenly knows how he did it that day.

“I'm okay now.” Simon said. 

He leaned in and next thing they knew they were kissing. And he's got that same feeling again. It's a soft but long and sweet kiss. As he described it once: It's almost too perfect. Too Disney. 

He is definitely in love. 

Two hours later they are heading home, and they're listening showtunes. And Bram is figuring out the words, smiling while he stares at the window. Simon looks at him for a moment and he thinks about all the times he thought if he deserved to be loved. And as he looks at him, he is genuinely happy. Like, completely and overwhelmingly ‘the-sun-just-came-out’ happy. And he thinks everyone deserves to feel the same too. He is actually dating Bram Greenfeld. 

This can't actually be him.


End file.
